Homeless in Hokkaido Part 2

I looked at the clock... I was almost at 13 minutes! I was setting a personal record of how long an old lady could yell at me about how irresponsible, lazy, and immature I am without saying a word back. The last time I broke this record I was 15 years old, I had just been arrested by the police at 2 in the morning, and the yelling old lady was my mother. The difference was this time I was 28 years old, I quit my job a week early, and the yelling old lady was some crazy woman I met 4 days ago. Also the first old lady kicked me out 10 years later, and the second one kicked me out the next morning.

So if you ever find yourself homeless in Japan, here's how I got through the odeal.

Sold out! Sold out! Sold out! Not the thing you want to see after getting yelled at by someone who isn't your mother.

Step 1: See if you can find a hostel for the night. They are cheaper than hotels and completely booked when the Annual Hokkaido Marathon is in town. Unfortunately, I didn't know there was a marathon going on when I told my boss the bad news. So onto step 2 for me.

Step 2: Stalk people. I saw a guy walk up to the reception desk, ask a question in Japanese, look disappointed, and walk into the elevator. I don't understand Japanese, but I knew this guy was in the same situation as me. So I followed him and we became friends.

I think he has been stalked before... He seemed to know what was going on.
He even took the picture and emailed it to me

Step 3: Goto every expensive looking hotel and prepare to be disappointed. We were trying to find a hotel that would have a room cheaper than 200$ a night. After 6 hotels, I got so desperate and thought about busting into some crappy Carly Rae Jepsen parody that went like, "Hey, I just met you, and this is crazy. But let's split the room cost, and have my babies."

Unfortunately for us, not even Hotel Dormy Inn had a room for us. So onto step 4 

Step 4: Enter the internet cafe. For Westerners this might sound insane, but sleeping in an internet cafe is pretty normal in Japan.

 You've got your choice of flat floor, computer chair, or reclining leather chair.

You've also got your own personal space inside your own little room.

 

                       And no Japanese Internet Cafe is complete without a shower room!

I chose the room with the mat and tucked my head under the table. I started to think really hard about karma because it was the only thing stopping me from thinking about the hundreds of people that have masturbated at the exact spot where my head was lying. I started to laugh at this perfect example of instant karma. I mess up somebody's plan; Now I lay awake staring at the bottom of a desk and listening to the penetrating snore of my neighbor with my feet uncomfortably pressed against the door of my "room". Life has a funny way of balancing out.

Homeless in Hokkaido Part 1

Homeless in Hokkaido... Now that's something I thought I wouldn't be on my trip, but here I am at 7:30 in the morning at a Mister Donut with a coffee and donut trying to figure out where I'll live for the next few days. I'll go back a little bit...

I am doing this program called  WOOFing where you work 6 hours a day and receive free food and accommodations. I was working in a daycare for 2-5 year old children that focuses on teaching them English. I started to hate the job because my boss would tell me to do something, but her plans would never actually work out the way she wanted. Here are some examples:

Expectation #1: Give children bottle caps and teach them about numbers and colors.

Reality #1: Children eat and fight over bottle caps. They do not learn English.

Expectation #2: Give children sheets of newspaper and teach them about the different shapes and animals they can rip paper into it.

Reality #2: Children rip newspaper. They do not learn English.

Expectation #3: Take one child aside and have a one-on-one lesson with them.

Reality #3: The other seven children get bored, start fighting, and one child gets bitten... Twice. They do not learn English.

On top of that there were rules that weren't easy to enforce with 2 year olds...

I got a day off and I went on a 4 hour bike ride...

and things became clearer...

                                                           and clearer...

until I finally reached the ocean.

I found a ramen shop owned by a family on the beach. The mother asked me where I am from and whether I'm a good skiier (because I'm from Canada), the father offered me his binoculars to look out at the ocean while I waited for my ramen, and one of the daughters let me hold her 6 month old baby. At this moment, I realized I was so frustrated and upset with my job because I was missing family. I came to this English school because I thought I would feel the warmth of a Japanese family and learn about the culture, but instead I was treated like a cold disposable worker that had to execute ridiculous orders.

So I told my boss that I wanted to shorten my stay to a week.  I know I was being selfish, but sometimes it's more important to take care of yourself, even if that means hurting others. I ended up paying the price for cancelling, but I'll tell you about that later.

For now, I leave you with a comment left by another person who had a terrible time with my boss.

I wish I read this earlier because it would have saved me a lot of pain and suffering.